Parenting Styles - 1, 2, 3, 4

There are 4 different types of parenting styles:  Authoritarian, Authoritative, Permissive and Uninvolved Parenting Styles. If you could put them into a box or chart to show them it might look something like this.

Taken from: www.madpsychmum.com

A brief description of the four parenting styles could be:

Authoritarian Parenting:  A large amount of control.  Parent has a large amount of control over their children, and their children mainly feel loved only when their parent approves of them.
Authoritative Parenting:  A healthy balance of love and control.  Children feel loved and accepted unconditionally, while knowing exactly what is expected of them by their parent.
Permissive Parenting:  There is love in the home, but no sense of control or structure in the home.  Parent feels it is wrong, or may feel unable, to set up rules of conduct and expectations.  Children feel loved because they get to do whatever they want.
Uninvolved Parenting:  There is no sense of control or love in the home.  Children do not feel loved because they have no sense of belonging in their home and do not feel loved by their parent.  In these homes the parents are often gone, so there is little to no control, structure, or expectations.  Children may feel lost with that lack of attentiveness and concern.

Taken from: departments.weber.edu

When you study the parenting styles it is typically believed that Permissive and Uninvolved parenting are the least desirable mainly because it sets up the parent for not even being involved in the home as an actual parent.  Many parents who choose to be Permissive or Uninvolved are perceived as more of an equal to their children, or as another child, in the home.  These parenting styles also do not set up the healthy boundaries of a parent being in a position of authority over their child, which children actually need to thrive, and not survive in life.  Also, these parenting styles set up unclear expectations for children to feel loved.

Authoritarian parenting is considered to be an more desirable parenting style because it sets up a parent to be in a position of authority over their child.  While at the same time this parenting style can be undesirable because it can lead towards the children not respecting or loving their parent depending upon how harsh their parent is.

Authoritative parenting, which is similar in name and meaning to Authoritarian parenting, allows more flexibility than the Authoritarian parenting style does.  Authoritative parenting lets the child know clearly where the parent and the child are in their separate roles.  It also allows for a sense of responsibility from both while nurturing a loving relationship between a parent and their child.  This is considered to be the most desirable parenting style because it allows for love, control, structure, and healthy expectations from both the parent and their child.

Taken from:  blog.leb.umn.edu

All four parenting styles may present challenges to any parent.  Finding a balance of love, leadership, control, structure, balance, and consistently is difficult for anyone to do.  Most people fall back on the parenting style they were raised with, by their parents, to give them direction about how to raise their children.  Some may accept it and move forward with parenting their children in the same way.  Those who want to change their parenting style may be faced with many barriers that make it difficult to change, if they do not have a support system or role model which helps them accomplish that.

As you ponder which parenting style you follow, be fair to yourself and allow for flexibility and change when needed.  Who we are, is always a work in progress, and we always have the chance to change ourselves, and our lives, when needed.